The sky matches my heart.

Here in Redding, supposedly the second sunniest place in the country. It's cold, gloomy and rainy. Though, today, something about it feels right. It matches what I am feeling inside. I feel like the sky is crying tears I don't know how to cry. Once again I feel alone. I feel left behind. 9 months ago I left everything back home, and now, now all of the people I let myself get closest to here are gone. I know I am not really alone. Papa is there for you, "they" say. ...But that's not the answer I want to hear. Years ago I didn't know how to connect with the people around me, I have learned so much and I am still learning. But to connect with Papa God, that's a totally different story.  My goal this summer is to press into Him, to break into that intimate place with Him. I know it's going to be hard, and it will probably be painful, breaking things off and steeping into new freedoms. But I am so ready for it. I need it. I HAVE to know Him. Really know Him. With all my heart I wish I could skip the next 12 weeks, but I really feel like it is probably going to be the most growth filled season of my life. So please, be praying for me this summer, it would mean a lot. Pray that I wouldn't let this season pass me by, I know it's up to me to get out of this time that I want. Pray that I would press through the hard, painful and lonely times. Pray that I could see what is possible, sometimes I get stuck and just can't see anything but what surrounds me. Thank you  friends. LOVE YOU!!!