Random thoughts: What not to say to a single, childless, late 20 something. "Just be glad you..."

I have been throwing around a thought of something a friend said to me a little while ago, and just feel like I want to put down my thoughts in writing.
First I'll give you some background and context for this blog. Growing up I have always had a great desire in my heart to be a wife and a mother, and really just to make a difference in this world. I remember being about 15 and telling people that I could see myself having lots of children. But now here I am, 10+ years latter. I am 27, living in my hometown, single, childless, and just not living the life I envisioned. And honestly I am ok with that, I really am. I have grown, learned, and experienced so much in the last 10 years, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

But the desires of my heart still remain.

So there I am just chatting with a friend about a week or so ago, and she makes a comment. It goes something like this... you should really be glad you have your singleness and all the freedom you have not to be attached to a spouse. I know her heart was so good, and loving towards me. So I really don't want to pick her statement apart, but at the same time I know I have heard it before and it made me think.

Just be glad you...

Also today I made a post that it's been challenging to be on social media this week because  the majority of posts I see are either engagements, weddings, birth announcements, births, or friends leaving on missions trips. I really don't often deal with envy and I feel like I am pretty good at choosing to celebrate others victories. This week just feels overwhelmed by all these events. When I made that post I got more of the, just be glad you...statements.

Just be glad you...are single and have so much freedom.
Just be glad you...can get a good, full nights rest not having a baby to take care of.
Just be glad you...don't have to deal with international security and a 14 hour flight.

I totally get the heart of the people making these statements. I do. They care, they want me to look at the "bright side".  Rarely do I even bring up the greatest desires in my heart for the future because I am quite happy with what God is doing with me here and now. I feel like I am a pretty optimistic person, and maybe I would, and possibly have made these statements to others before. Maybe I am just a bit tender in the moment right now, but when I really think about it, sometimes those statements feel like a hot arrow to the heart. It makes me want to respond back... Would you give up your spouse for a bit of freedom??? Would you give up your beautiful baby for a full nights sleep???? Would you give up your chance to go impact the world for the kingdom, just to not have to go through the headache of travel????? I am pretty sure the answer to those questions would be NO WAY!!!!

So what's the resolution to this thought process I just spewed on my computer screen while I should be asleep??? I think maybe it's being a bit more sensitive and not comparing your current life circumstances to someone else's.  Because really in these cases one is most often not better than the other. And not knowing the deep desires in the persons heart we maybe be blindly shooting hot arrows. I plan on just celebrating what God is doing in my life and the lives of others. Without comparing.  Without the, "I wish I was..." or the "just be glad you..." statements.